yesterday...on wednesday(11/4)
i did not know
what happen to me
i really don't know

my mother sent me to school
she talked about him
i wanted to cry
but i tahan

when i reached school
i reached my class
all of them were looking
into a science textbook

i reached my table
mardi said to me
'eh,nari ader science test tau..
kau tau?aku terlupa nak bilang..
kau ader blajar?'

i told her that i studied a bit
but truth is i didn't
even know that there
was a science test

i quickly took out my book
then i turned to the page
when i looked into it,
suddenly could not
control myself anymore

i cried...i cried real hard
i was crying because the books
remind me of him i really miss him a lot...

mardi realized it...
she asked me what had happened
and why i cried all of a sudden

i wanted to answer
but can't she see that i was crying?
how to answer while crying hard?
i just cried

i didn't answered her
ct looked at me and asked mardi
what had happend..
then she asked me the same question

i was really unable to answer
i was crying the hell out of me..
i was crying out my pain
the pain that i had tahan

somebody handed me a tissue
i wiped it with my tears
i tried to stop crying but
tears just flow down my cheek

ct acked me
if somebody scolded me
i gelengkan my head

she asked if it is about him
i nodded
she asked if i missed him
and i was crying
because of him

i continued to cry
then the bell rang
i took a tissue packet
given by eng hoong

i brought down
my science textbook
i managed to stop my tears
i didn't want anybody
to ask me why i was crying

audric was asking me the question
i did not reply
because my mouth could not open
i just looked at the book

however,i was unable
to concentrate on the book
i can't even remember anything
i only remember the face of him

i cried a little
i wiped a little bit
i wanted to study
but nothing went inside ny brain

then, i saw mardi
she said that mr yew
wants to start the test already...
i was surprised

she said to me
not to cry
i started to cry a bit
then,we reached the class

i was wiping my tears away
then as i was sitting down
i looked at him
he saw me

he asked me if i was okay
i started to cry
i took a tissue and
covered my eyes

mardi told him that
i was sick...
then ct told him that
i missed my brother

he stood at my table
and said to me
'we have to move on
in life...we cannot wait for time
blah...blah....'

i just cried
i didn't listen to
what he was saying
i buried my face in my hands

then the test was starting
i was still crying
then mr yew started the test
i only wrote my name
on the paper

i suddenly started crying again
i was covering my eyes with my tissue
mardi said 'mr yew, i don't think
that nada is prepared to do her test'

i was still crying
he came and asked me
'nada, don't cry
i know that you are
a strong girl

do you still want to
continue your test?'
i geleng my head
while crying

'okay tomorrow you come
in the morning at 6.40am..
take a rest first...'

i was still crying..
after i don't know
how many minutes...
i had finally stopped crying...

it was when the test has finished
that i stopped crying
maybe because there were
no more tears left...

however,i am struggling
not to miss him so much
i promise that i will study hard...